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October 26, 2004

I hate them all. Barging in, invading my private spaces, stealing my hard-earned treasures, killing my loyal pets...no more mercy for these interlopers! They shall not be allowed to leave alive!

They will soon be introduced to my most devious traps yet. They will all perish.

My cohorts and I have begun to devise even better means of protecting our treasures and aiding our pets. The evil gnomish artificers report that they’re installing new magic devices that will aid the pets as they patrol my domain and ward off trespassers. The problems we’ve had with our precious pets running blindly off of cliffs will soon be a thing of the past. I rejoice, for we’ve lost far too many of them that way. Stupid kobolds.

The new spaces are coming along nicely. This latest expansion under the sewers should prove quite debilitating for those simple-minded, faint-hearted intruders. I will flush them down into the bowels of the earth along the slippery slopes like the filth they are. Just to ensure a more...terminal ride, I have hatched a brood of spiders to overlook things along the way.

I’ve been monitoring the progress of my new assistants, and they have shown much promise. One in particular has begun to teach a group of those greedy merchants in the Harbor District – they now understand that to defy me is insanity. Woe to all who attempt to claim their cargo from this particular warehouse!

My other apprentice is in the process of making our latest shipment of kobolds at home in their own layer. He has tricked them into zealous loyalty by granting them an enchanted gem that they covet and fiercely protect. He is still teaching them where to patrol to watch for interlopers and other nasty tricks, but yes, he is making fine progress.

Soon, very soon, I will be able to go fix that pesky noble in Stormreach who dared defy me. I plan on infesting his cellar with the most vicious of nasties, which should keep those intrepid adventurers from seeking the treasures I secreted away there. What’s more, the noble will be cut off from his own precious heirlooms to boot!

Hah! I win!